Navigating the Heart: A Woman's Journey Through the Decision to Have a Child - Part 1

I took a long break from writing and forced to reconfigure the direction I thought my life was headed. A lot of us feel lost these days. Time seems to be moving past us so fast, we hardly get a chance to get a handle of the things that need our attention. We are constantly bombarded with responsibilities and even when you think you are capable of accomplishoing them, you are still left feeling empty. Life has become expensive and unlivable for most. Now I am what some will say in th emiddle class and should therefore be grateful I am not living on $15/hr salary. Yes, I am grateful I get paid enough to see me through these challenging economic times. However, I am still among the millions in this country who find themselves unable to make plans about the future. So politics aside, let's talk about children, and why more women are choosing not to have them.

As a woman going through your mid-thirties, everyone judges you for being single and childless. They make assumptions as to why you are not in a relationship, they judge for your standards. But, what most fail to understand is that our journies are never alike. One decision maybe easier for you but harder for some, just the same some decisions maybe harder for you but easier for some. Millennial women have been called out for changing the dating dynamics for the worst. We have been accused of being too picky, judgemental, impatient, overbearing, and the reason why we are single. We have also been attacked for choosing to remain childless. But in the middle, there is a woman who is not being talked about, the woman who is legitimately struggling with the decision to start a family.

Millenials have lived through multiple economic crashes and traumatising world events. According to Priceweber 2024 study, Millennials are increasingly becoming part of the Sandwich Generation who are finding themselves taking care of their aging parents at the same time raising their own families. No one talks about this being a deterring factor to most women. Women are most likley to become primary caretakers than men. With no additional support resources in the community, many of these women are having to choose between taking care of the person who gave them life or go out and make a life of their own.

According to Pew Research Center 2019 study, Millennial women have bachelor's degree than their male counterparts and 72% of the women were employed and part of the labor force. There is a silent part of this statistic that escapes our attention, more women are now carrying a large share of student loan debts and many of them cannot stay home to raise their children. With the high cost of living, it is impossible for families to live on only one income, therefore, both parents are required to have some form of employment to support a family of more than two. With ridiculous costs of childcare, it is clear our federal and state governments are not making it easier to have children. Young couples cannot afford single family homes or two bedroom apartments due to the housing crisis that sent rent and home prices through the roof permanently locking out most young people from the dream of home ownership.

There are legitimate concerns that these women are facing for them to pay attention to the global birth-rate crisis. You are asking these women to get into mountains of debt just to fullfill a numbers game. It's not "out of control feminism" that is the probelm. And unless we start listening, the problem will get out of hand and it will be too late to fix it. These series will take a deeper dive into these issues and how to fix them. see you in Part 2.